Doubts and Doubting Thomases

I have had a few people asking why I took a break from blogging and urging me to resume, believe you me it feels good to know people are concerned. So Padma, Poorani and others thank you for the concern and encouragement. My break was a result of a personal loss, of which I wont say much, because I believe loss is private and should be dealt with alone. And as is wont in difficult times one’s beliefs and faith are tested. It took me to the various times in the past when several of my traditional beliefs where put through the test.

I remember the movie The Last Temptation of Christ and the furore it created. I was young and wondered  what was the big deal about Jesus having feelings for Mary Magdalene or him having doubts about his last suffering. Did it change my views? No, I was used to reading about God’s that were really human – Krishna, Arjuna, Rama and all my other heroes from Amar Chitra Katha. For me it was fine for God or Demigod to have normal feelings. There were other controversies like the Turin Shroud, remnants of Noah’s Ark which again were matters of grave discussion.

And then came Dan Brown and the Da Vinci Code that threatened to shake the foundations of Christendom. The Vatican was up in arms, and so were a few other factions. Did it change my beliefs? No. What if Christ loved Mary, what if he had a child? Does it take away anything from his teachings? absolutely not. It however got me thinking, was there truth in some parts of the novel? Was it all a hushed up by the church? But why? Jeffery Archer tried to stir up some controversy with the Gospel According to Judas, at best it was like a short story written by a high school student.

Recently there have been discussions about St. Thomas and his journey to India. Some eminent historians aver that he didn’t come to India and that it is an elaborate make believe story. They say there are no records, however there is a belief that the Portugese wiped out all evidence. Does historical evidence really matter in matters of faith? Whether Thomas came to India or not, Syrian Christians will still be Christians…will that make me less Christian? Do my values change because Thomas didn’t visit India? No….